Jason Reviews UnComix One-Shots No. 2 (Un-Iverse #16)! 💫

[jasonderoga86]

Hey, Dreamwidth Family!

The time has finally freaking come! Got some good downtime right now, and I’ve been itching to get into the second of a series of One-Shot chapters in Matt Zimmer’s Gilda and Meek and the Universe. Today we’re diving into One-Shots No. 2, titled “Narf-Narf And Chirp” – the cat and bird duo who made their first appearance in the previous One-Shot “The Humans”. I found both characters amusing and at times adorably dense, especially Narf-Narf; the scene in the last story of Narf-Narf revealing a stockpile of assorted oral sprays to a Dog who stood guard over it had me drop my jaw in disbelief, for lack of a better word. The chemistry Narf-Narf and Chirp have with Stella Stickyfingers was also a neat dynamic, especially with how they planned out a major heist and managed to have a contingency plan when things inevitably went wrong. The story had a very “Ocean’s Eleven” feel, and also tied in nicely with the main narrative of Gilda and Meek overall.

But listen to me yammer on – the Narrator just told me to shut up, ‘cuz we’re doing this. Yes, SIR.

Gilda And Meek - UnComix One-Shots No. 2 (Un-Iverse #16): “Narf-Narf And Chirp” Review

Story One: “Narf-Narf and Chirp Attend A Book-burning - Letters by Matt Zimmer”

·        We meet our Dynamic Duo in Chirp’s treehouse, with Narf-Narf having chased off another one of Chirp’s baby-girls. Chirp is cleaning his bed of assorted insects, which makes me wonder – if there are bugs in that bed, and Chirp was just cuddling with another chickadee moments ago… man, do I feel sorry for her.

·        Okay, it seems like Narf-Narf apparently had something to do the mess in Chirp’s bed. Noted.

·        Outside the treehouse, we’re introduced to some other chums living around Chirp’s pad; two squirrels, Earl and Pearl, and their son Merle. Interestingly, Narf-Narf is the only feline that doesn’t drive this squirrel family into a terrified frenzy – but we also learn that if Narf-Narf is indeed carnivorous, he keeps it to himself. Which is a good thing, because the rest of the cast present ARE warm-blooded animals and exposing such a preferred palate would spark some, um… problems. Another secret he’s keeping from his friends here is his sociopathic nature, which would create even more, um… problems. But given that he hasn’t disclosed these rather unsettling traits, Narf-Narf has the trust of Chirp and the squirrel family, so it’s all good in the hood, y’all.

·        The squirrel family is getting ready to attend a book-burning hosted by none other than the Rev. Vic Puff. Chirp ponders why a squirrel would bother to view such a thing, and… oh my God… Narf-Narf may be crazy, but he’s straight up REAL on why a squirrel would want to attend a book burning by a zealous White Evangelical Christian who obviously stole his way into a Reverend position – you gotta be nuts to willingly watch such a desecration of knowledge in the name of fundamentalism. I friggin’ LOVE the intended pun here. Nonetheless, our cat & bird duo decides they’ll check out the event.

·        The scene switches to the Rev. Vic Puff: the self-proclaimed White Evangelical, the Conduit himself. And he’s got a rather telling mantra: “It is not a sin if you don’t get caught.” I wonder how many real-life ministers and preachers mentioned that to themselves to fool their psyche into thinking it’s “doing God’s work” to take in billions of dollars without paying any taxes (learned that from the late great George Carlin) and/or use the sanctity of a church to abuse children behind closed doors? I know there are some big names in that gallery of infamy, it’s just that a name escapes me at the moment…

·        We are given a clear view of Puff’s unceremonious Incendie de Livres at the start of his “Cavalcade of Demagoguery”. Chirp and Narf-Narf are in the nosebleed section of the otherwise zealous crowd, as is the Squirrel family. The Narrator makes a rather hilarious point about the absence of the Gilda and Meek cast in the crowd, as they would dilute the suckery of the UnComix One-Shots, and that suckery shall not be infringed. As he so often tells us, “Shut up. We’re doing this.” And as I keep saying, I’m loving this.

·        Among the crowd, we see several cultists wildly waving signs and showing off merchandise (there’s even a Klansman in attendance – who’d have thought…), most of which show support for Ted Nugent’s 2016 presidential campaign. Wow. This crowd is backing a guy who called Dianne Feinstein a “worthless whore” to “ride” a gun as he’s assault weapons/2A fanatic, as well as a loose cannon so tribalistic that the Secret Service had to admonish him for a clear death threat against Barack Obama – whom he refused to stop calling an “evil subhuman mongrel”. Yeah. Narf-Narf ain’t the one with loose screws in his head at this heretical gathering. Not by a LONG shot.

·        Vic Puff begins his sermon of Nazism, branding the “Godless”, the faithless, the liberals, and most of all, the kind. Yeah, you heard him: the kind. And this is one of the reasons I love Gilda and Meek and the Un-Iverse and these One-Shots: they make me think. They help me deconstruct what look like complex issues into simple, common-sense views. And Matt Zimmer is a soul who does is not politically active on actual political grounds, per se. He is a Partisan Democrat for a perfectly logical and relatable reason: he believes that people should simply be kind to each other. Just imagine how much progress we could make as a society if we weren’t always at each other’s throats thirsting for blood while soulless and arrogant elites profit from our misguided warring amongst ourselves.

·        Puff gives his best impression of Ron DeSantis’s presidential campaign with “War on Woke” preaching points, lauding Christian nationalism ideology while condemning books like Margaret Atwood’s The Handmaid’s Tale, then mentioning Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451 and then… Judy Blume’s Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret. I’ve read a lot of Judy Blume’s books in elementary school and early middle school, but I must confess I’ve never read Are You There, God? It’s Me Margaret. I remember reading that it was one of most well-known entries on banned book lists, so I see the significance to this story. 

·        Next, Rev. Puff adds the tomes to an even larger pile of other “blasphemous” books from the likes of John Steinbeck (likely because Steinbeck would call bullshit on the wars that Christian nationalists are so obsessed with triggering. War is a symptom of mankind’s failure to act as thinking creatures, after all) and Stephen Hawking (because it’s always easier to attack wheelchair-bound prodigies with speech communication devices than to forcefully chastise an ultra-rich hack minister with a known track record of promoting deadly violence against harmless people like the LGBTQ+ community). The Narrator notes how this heretical congregation is so devoted to burning “wokeism” that they’re too stupid to realize they’re FUNDING that wokeism; the authors of these books can only laugh at these dunces as they count the profits from those sales. Also, I often wonder: if Red States are so fanatical about banning books, how can they also hold people like Jeff Bezos in such high regard? I mean, to borrow a talking point from many kids in those states, what good is banning books when those kids can just buy those same books from Amazon, which is, you know… OWNED by Bezos? Yep, I’m with the Narrator on this one – right-wing Republicans ARE idiots.

·        The Rev. does his own impression of Judge Claude Frollo from Disney’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame by speaking in Scripture terms as he prepares to arouse the inferno upon the mountain of tomes, displaying a sort of sadistic pleasure only the farthest of the Christian right would appreciate. Interestingly, Narf-Narf is equally aroused by the Flames of Hell. The Narrator goes into full detail to describe the satisfaction of pure destruction, without logic or reason. It’s a damn spot-on spectacle that aptly sums up the Christian nationalism that has hijacked America, a succinct visual message that explains how this radicalism does not seek to unite, does not seek to spread the Gospel of Jesus Christ, does not seek to serve as a beacon founded on the principles of the Sermon on the Mount. The goal of Christian nationalism, especially in America, is first and foremost the destruction of everything the Religious Right denounces as sinful and evil – namely, everything that is not White, cis-gender male, and Christian nationalist. And The Narrator delivers that in just a few sentences; why can’t it be this simple to denounce zealots in real life?

·        And as if God himself had had enough of the bastardization of His son’s way of life, the embers of the inferno latch onto Rev. Vic’s hairpiece – ‘cuz, as we all know, he’s actually bald – which he then ignites on his shirt sleeve and then his entire form. Yep, the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away… and He’s taking away the misconstrued glory a false prophet had basked in for their own satisfaction. As my mom once said in a talk with the mother of a friend of my brother’s long ago, “God don’t sleep”.

·        Rev. Vic’s predicament is further explained as Chirp mentions his gutting of the budget for the Fire Department. See, cutting vital services in pursuit of a Christian government CAN hurt people of ALL political parties! A lesson that modern-day America is being forced to learn at the moment… *shifts eyes around*

·        Rev. Vic is saved by his followers, who put out the Flames of Hell in an manner that’s paradoxically hellish in its own right while giving Vic the most disturbing sense of satisfaction that would get any other priest excommunicated from their congregation were it made public. Meanwhile, Chirp notices the Observer from “Fringe” donning his hat and grabbing his briefcase as Narf-Narf declares himself one bored cat. Chirp soon follows suit, both animal buddies acknowledging they wasted a good chunk of their lives that they certainly won’t be getting back. But Vic is one happy cult leader despite the many first-degree burns he’ll be nursing for a time nearly comparable to the afterlife he foolishly thinks he’s entitled to for this deed of Christian nationalism, looking into the heavens and apparently feeling like God has already welcomed him home. The Narrator ends the story on a disgusted note, and I gotta say I’ve never seen a right-wing Christian THIS masochistic. But again, I’m seeing a lot of ‘em today who are steering down that road…

Story Number Two: Meek And Bernadette “Money Well Spent”. Numbers by Matt Zimmer 

·        One day at the Robinson residence, we see Meek and Bernadette during some down time. Out of the blue, Meek asks her who’d be the last one standing between him and Superman. Bernadette, who’s immersed in a copy of The Good Book, promptly favors Kal-El over Meek with the most casual, matter-of-fact expression I’ve seen in quite a while.

·        Meek then poses the same query again and again, but against a slew of other fictional pop-culture powerhouses including Batman, Spider-Man, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and Xena: Warrior Princess. By the time Meek brings up Kermit the Frog, Bernadette gives him that look – the look of someone who is clearly annoyed and barely restraining themselves. And Bernadette follows that up with a statement telling Meek that it’d be wise to kill this conversation now while it’s only in the “annoying” stage.

·        Meek, however, demands an answer to his contest. Bernadette’s bet is on Kermit. Meek, clearly seeing he’s outmatched by pop-culture icons, challenges Bernadette with Elmo – which I would personally say is a bridge too far – and Bernadette responds with what could only constitute a literal threat from Elmo to Meek. But boy, the aspiring warrior here is not someone who concedes easily…

·        Meek’s next hypothetical challengers are Snuggle the Fabric Softener Bear, an inanimate carbon rod, and Mary-Kate and Ashley circa Full House. Bernadette’s responses to each are deadpan shutdowns, but when Meek mentions ex-Fox News pundit Geraldo Rivera, she suddenly declares him the victor. Meek takes that response as a rush from the most potent energy drink one can imagine and sets off to deck Geraldo a good one with gusto… hey, I guess if I’d been shutdown by all those other contenders, ANY victory would suffice. Meek is ready to go, ready to end Rivera’s career once and for all, confident smile and tough-guy sleeve-rolling to boot! There’s gonna be some serious hell to pay—

·        And Bernadette ends Meek’s bravado by stating the obvious: he can’t just go looking for Geraldo Rivera just to beat the hell out of him, as that would constitute a crime. And Meek’s bravado disappears right then and there, knowing he can’t debate with that logic. Deflated and defeated, Meek resigns to the couch… just as The Piranha skips by, singing the most common fair-use lofty song in existence. Now Meek is the annoyed one and asks Bernadette if he could take on and beat Pirahna. Bernadette again states Meek has all the spades in that fight. Meek wants assurance, and Bernadette responds not just with affirmation, and encouragement – she’s saying, “Go get ‘im, Pops! Papa gonna knock him OUT!”

·        Meek still feels somewhat unsure, but Bernadette guarantees this is a win-win fight with one helluvan encouraging smirk. With gratitude, Meek ambushes Piranha and does his best impression of Will Smith’s Agent Jay from “Men in Black” as he taunts Pirahna. And I gotta admit, with that scene from the film playing in the back of my head and reading this scene with Meek channeling Will Smith-esque bravado, I am laughing inside at the hilarity. Meek just up and tore after Piranha with just the slightest of provocation. This is gonna be good…

·        And my God, how the fight ends… I gotta take a minute and laugh this out before I can keep writing… hold on, hold up…

·        …ahem. *exhales deeply* Okay, where was I? Oh, right – the Piranha absolutely DESTROYED Meek. Don’t screw with the Fish, playa. Bernadette then displays some of the craftiest logic I’ve seen yet: first, she asks Meek what he learned from the melee, and Meek answers correctly that she owes him six bucks – she bet six bucks that Meek would win in a fistfight with Piranha, which set him off against the lil’ fish to begin with. But before he took off, Meek said in wonder: “Your logic is impeccable.” And indeed, it is; as Meek proceeds to head to the nearest convenience store to buy some chips, soda, and a “moderately priced” comic book (but likely less than they are at your average comic book shop today… $5 for a 32-page magazine with 12 of those pages being advertisements? Is it ANY wonder almost everyone only buys trades now?), Bernadette returns to her Scripture in peace, content that those six bucks were worth it while Meek’s grunts of pain fade out. Once again, the obvious is clear: Bernadette may be a cute, innocent, and conservative Christian lil’ girl by appearance, but she is one crafty and clever kid with the kind of snark that could petrify the conservative talking heads of today. Heh… now ain’t that a shame?   

 

Story Number Three: The Humans “Clowns Are Scary” Shapes and Sizes by Matt Zimmer

·        Our Narrator friend starts off this story with an invocation of the now-deceased “soul-devouring war criminal” Dick Cheney. Due to recent news of Cheney’s interment, I guess that second heart transplanted into him turned out to be incompatible with his systems; the only thing sadder than wondering whose heart was buried into Cheney to prolong his life is the reminder of Molly Ivins having died earlier than him. We can make of that what we will, and turn to the main story.

·        We meet The Humans as they trot by a “Help Needed” style sign; a nearby carnival needs trapeze artists, and the Humans are penniless from their earlier search for their “brother” Link (a testament to the extent of these four’s lack of intuition on fact and fiction). As the Humans are primates, the idea of trapeze performances doesn’t seem too bad…

·        Waltzing into the carnival’s main area, the Humans are starstruck at the fellas before them; a rather odd-looking Learned Republican, a confident-looking and striking Bearded Hairless Cat, and a rather curious-looking Two-Headed Fish. They are the first main attractions of a Freak Show, and the nearby Ringmaster states that of all the “freaks” present the Learned Republican is quite literally a rare treasure of such. I’m intrigued by the title “Learned” Republican… my first guess is that this fellow was once a neutral-minded citizen with no political affiliation, who somehow got swept up into conservative viewpoints; hell, if social media exists at this in the Un-Iverse, then I’d wager this Learner was snared by far right-wing algorithms and advertisements. Either way, this guy does intrigue me, albeit with caution…

·        The Humans meet up with the Ringmaster, who looks a bit like both Luigi from the Super Mario Bros. franchise and Barney Rubble from The Flintstones. And boy, he is thrilled to see four new applicants for the position of trapeze performers. But he warns that this role is not for the faint of heart – the Flying Graysons previously held this job, only to one day meet a terrible fate. That fateful day led a young acrobat down the path of eventually becoming a sidekick to a man who can only be described as “Vengeance” and “The Night”. But that’s the DC Comics universe; we’re in the Un-Iverse, and if the Ringmaster says that the less we speak about the Flying Graysons, the better, we’ll leave it at that.

·        The Humans perform their training course flawlessly and are given the job. The Learned Republican suddenly peeks in and randomly asserts that he can literally recite the entire Bible, to which the Ringmaster promptly snaps and demands the spectacled biblical scholar to clam up. So now, it’s clear that the L.R. is a pure conservative – being able to recite the entire Bible leads me to believe this guy is a Bonafide Evangelical Christian Republican. My earlier caution was necessary after all, it seems.

·        The Humans witness a trio of scary Clowns deep in a poker game with their ghastly features illuminated by the campfire nearby, with two of them musing over the money they procured from some freaks while also jeering that the freaks would’ve wasted that cash on trivial things in town. Yep, sounds pretty scary-Clowny to me, ghastly illuminated faces aside.

·        The Bearded Hairless Cat warns the Humans about the gravity of the task ahead, accentuating his mystique by emphasizing the risk involved. The Learned Republican tries to add his two cents but is promptly silenced by the annoyed fish he’s carrying. The ruckus catches the attention of the Clowns, who immediately confront the group. While the Learned Republican and the two lil’ fish take the hint and silence themselves, the Bearded Hairless Cat attempts some cordiality by complimenting on the bright, trademark red of their noses. The Humans seize that opportunity and try to score those noses, leading to a short brawl between the four determined boys and the far superior Clowns. In fact, it was so short that within moments the Humans are cast into the tents, setting off a chain of flames ready to consume the tents!

·        At the same time, the Ringmaster appears and demands to know what’s going down. Only seconds later, the freaks join the brawl with the Clowns while both sides ignore the spread of the flames as they devour the circus tents. Surprisingly, Davy is wise enough to mount an elephant to douse some of the blaze with her trunk at full pressure, but the Ringmaster’s focus is on the melee that transpired between the freaks and the Clowns. They truthfully explain that the Humans started the conflict, but the Ringmaster understands that reparations will take precedence… that will cost the entirety of their savings. As the Narrator concludes, they aren’t ruined… but it looks like they’ll be back to square one once all is said and done. Of course, that will include the Humans as they DID start the whole ordeal. The Ringmaster demands they pay up for their actions…

·        … and receives the payment in the form of a banana and a large mound of monkey scat. Naturally, the Ringmaster goes into a rage (and will probably blow a few blood vessels too, given the incredulous gesture of that payment) as the Humans hightail it off the premises. The freaks steal back their cash from the unsuspecting Clowns while the Bearded Hairless Cat muses on taking a liking to the Humans. The Learned Republicans attempts to end the episode on a rather thoughtful note by invoking George Will but is promptly silenced by everyone… including the Bearded Hairless Cat. Man, this guy got burned SO bad.

·        We’re treated to a brief intermission, with Meek happening by an advertisement for “Flood Beer”, which is billed as something that Granny drinks. Hilariously, Meek is unmoved by the hook, which conveys that the product’s greatness is proved by its horrible PR. Why a company would trash its own sales hook as proof of how good the product is, well…

 

Story Number Four: Howler “Bad Moon Rising, Part Two: A Brief History of Werewolves” One Of These Things Is Not Like Matt Zimmer

·     Ah, yes – the second part of the Howler story. Part One ended on one helluva cliffhanger as Howler assumed a terrifying werewolf form, and FBI agent Phil Douglass was left with no other choice but to fire on him after the former tried to warn Douglass. Phil is naturally in a state of shock as the reality of the situation sets in, wherein the Narrator emphasizes the gravity of the moment by noting Howler becoming a werewolf did not excuse shooting him. It’s a harsh statement but rooted in a moral sense; maybe a taser to subdue Howler would’ve sufficed so he’d just be unconscious. But the deed is done, and Phil will have to live with it. Moving along…

·     BUT, given that Howler was shot in the shoulder, he returns to normal and thanks Agent Douglass. Agent Douglass – and me as well – stand in shock at what just took place. Howler reveals the truth: pain is the antidote to werewolf outbursts. I may not know anything about werewolf stories/urban legends, but I’ll take what I can get. It isn’t long before a nurse hurries in wondering what went down, but Howler quickly defuses her confusion with a simple explanation of an accidental discharge of his weapon and a quick apology to anyone who was terrified. The Nurse doesn’t take it well at all, as she wasn’t just terrified – she almost suffered a heart attack. Yeah, Howler… not the most comforting thing you could’ve said, especially given that you’re in a hospital…

·     Agent Douglass comes to grips with the fact that Howler is in fact a Werewolf and not a Dog, with Howler acknowledging what befell of Douglass’s previous partner and apologizing for it. Howler also tries to dissipate the stereotype about werewolves, claiming that not all werewolves are violent savages and some of them are just trying to get by, to which Agent Douglass is appreciative. I like Howler’s point of view here; judging an entire group of people by the wrong actions of just one of that group is stereotyping (and potentially scapegoating) at its core. It discourages keeping an open mind and leans into tribalism.

·     Howler’s wound cauterizes itself, much to Agent Douglass’s surprise. The former further explains how the werewolf healing factor works, adding that a full moon speeds up the process. The pain still lingers, but the bleeding has stopped. At that time, Howler notices a janitor nearby hard at work mopping the floor… and senses the guy’s been eavesdropping on the whole conversation. As Agent Douglass signs Howler’s discharge papers, the Janitor makes his way down the hall; he’s got an important phone call to make. Howler’s true identity as a Werewolf is no longer a secret for sure, and the Narrator is quite right: weirdness abounds.

·     Agent Ryan and Mitch, hiding among the mists of shadow, receive word from the janitor mole at the hospital confirming Howler revealing his identity to Agent Douglass. Both are aware of the urgency of the operation, and Agent Ryan insists it time to put the Werewolf down permanently. Mitch, however, counter-insists that such hastiness would only martyrize Howler to his Tribe and risk a frightening escalation. He remains committed to using him for leverage. Personally, I give Mitch credit for not jumping to conclusions. An operation of this magnitude requires a steady hand and calm, cool planning.

·     Later that evening, Agent Douglass is treated to dinner at Howler’s residence with the latter’s wife Audrey. He asks Howler what would happen if the hospital were to expose his secret to the FBI, to which the lupine responds bluntly that he’d be shown the door… on his first day, at that. Damn. Can’t kill a mic any faster than that. Agent Douglass fields another inquiry about the two kinds of Werewolves Howler mentioned earlier, and the lupine gives an incredibly detailed rundown: First there are the Borns, the most common form of Werewolf, and then there are the Infecteds, victims bitten by Werewolves that assume Werewolf form. For centuries, Borns like Howler and Audrey here learned to control their transformations through pain on the full moon; thus, they’ve mastered their restraint and ceased infecting people. Pretty cool, if you ask me. There’s something about werewolves mastering the suppression of their feral instincts that just says, “Wolves’ honor, bruh.”

·     But there is always the twist, and Howler’s tone turns uncomfortably serious as he states how Mistress Augatha came to desire an army of Werewolves after Borns officially went cold turkey on infecting people. Agent Douglass suddenly realizes scat just got real, as he remembers having looked up the Mistress’s FBI file and learned exactly what his partner just described. Augatha is preparing for a global takeover, and an army of Werewolves will provide a HELLUVA strike guard to facilitate it. Howler ups the urgency of the proposition, detailing Augatha’s aggressive strategy of sending Infecteds to infect countless victims to amass the Werewolves she requires, with her promise of a cure once her conquest is complete. Dismissing the idea that the Mistress was sincere about the cure, Howler states something FAR more consequential; he believes Douglass’s partner was preyed on by an Infected. Okay, now I’m a little worried…

·     His eyes locked on Agent Douglass, Howler suggests that by that logic Douglass’s partner is in fact alive and serving as an Infected for Augatha. Agent Douglass begins to unintentionally channel a Luke-Skywalker-denies-Darth-Vader’s-his-father vibe, refusing to entertain that his former partner would do such a thing. Howler, in response, not only doubles down but plays an eerie variation of the “Search your feelings” play by ending with a new spin: “No, Phil. It’s likely true… because WE work for Augatha.”

·     And as one would imagine, Douglass’s response to this revelation is about on par with Luke Skywalker’s “NOOOOOO! Noooooowwuuooo…”

·     Officially dropping the Star Wars fanfic narrative, Howler gets to business: In the 1980’s (Whoa, 1980’s? Born in 1986 on Halloween, yea-yea-yeah!) the U.S. government made a secret pact with the Mistress to relinquish all governmental control to her once she claims the world as Queen. Even more troubling, our – sorry, THE – government is willing to aid Augatha to make this dystopia a reality! Douglass asks the question on everyone’s mind: why would the government betray us to a rising despot? Howler regrettably does not know, and given that his career with the FBI is basically over (and on his first day! That part just… yikes, man!) he never will. Man, the curveballs keep coming, fast and BRUTAL.

·     Unwilling to be complicit to seditious conspiracy by the government, Agent Douglass swears to Howler that he will snoop around the FBI headquarters for the info Howler sought, but Howler sternly informs Douglass not to be overconfident; should Douglass fail or depending on what he does procure, there will be a price to pay, ranging from termination (pretty mild) to imprisonment in an off-the-books prison on espionage conviction (BRUTAL!)

·     Undeterred by the risks, Agent Douglass insists on taking the mission – if his government is okay with enabling Augatha rise to the throne, it’s a government he wants no part of. After all, he knows the truth: Mistress Augatha is widely feared for a damn good reason, and to help her would mean to betray basic morality and humanity. Audrey is genuinely touched and sees Douglass as a true friend, with Howler adding emphasis that his partner is the first non-Werewolf friend he’s ever had. And you know? Despite the daunting outlook of the stakes, this little moment right here eases my mind. Where there is bad, there is also good; one can’t exist without the other, where there’s a foreboding “what-if?”, there’s also the positive “what-if?” And above all, I’m hearing Gilda’s voice once more with her signature quote: Once you know a Future is Coming, You Can Change It. Guys and ladies, I’m feeling that mic-drop moment here.

·     As Agent Douglass takes a moment to appreciate the honor, both Howler and Audrey sense a group of Werewolves in the backyard. The married lupine couple immediately take their shoes off (Howler and Audrey wear shoes laced with tacks to halt their transformations under the full moon, so in this case… smart move, dawgs) while telling Douglass to make himself scarce. Seconds later, Werewolves burst through the wall with more bravado than the Kool-Aid Man ever had – and without joking up the moment with an inane “Oh, Yeaahhh!” – and immediately snatch Audrey. Agent Douglass ends up seeing stars with one hammer-punch to the jaw, and the Werewolves immediately jam Pain Darts in both Howler and Audrey, rendering their transformation halted – aw, MAN… I hope I’m wrong about this seems to be leading…

·     The Werewolves drag Howler to his own basement and lock/blockade the door. They seize the mortified Audrey and patch themselves through a communicator; while one of them gives a victorious howl, the other informs their contact that they’ve got the leverage – the very leverage that Mitch was referring. Yep, shit got real FAST. This UnComix One-Shot ends with a cliffhanger, as a seriously enraged Howler howls and attempts to break the basement door down to save his beloved while Agent Douglass lies out cold… talk about a successful seize-and-capture operation. Oy, vey… I admit I’m kind of in a state of shock at the sheer flawless execution here. But the next One-Shot might ease some of the “stunned breathless” feels I have right now, as we’re hooking back up with the persistent inquirer of screws and light bulbs, The Piranha! Yeeaaahhh!

 

First, I want to say that finishing up this One-Shot was a challenge… and not because I didn’t enjoy what I read. Come this March, I will have reached four years at my job at the IDD assistance program. Combined with my tenure at my first job as a courtesy clerk at the local grocery store from 2007 – 2011, that will mark eight years of service work for me. It’s really surreal, as many times I never thought I would make it this far. The trials of both 2024 – a year of pain, immense grief, and heartbreak from the loss of five people I cared about, with my best friend Steven’s ultimate sacrifice for us on Christmas after he did his civic duty as a poll worker during the 2024 election – and 2025 – a year-long personal grapple with the unprecedented lawlessness unleashed on even my own community, family, and friends by the “re-elected” sociopathic sadist enabled by the very institutions that were constitutionally mandated to bar him from office – were an extreme test of my resilience. And though I’ve come out relatively okay, I won’t sugarcoat it: I’m also exhausted, as is my family, friends, community, our participants at work, and our circle here on Dreamwidth. But that isn’t exactly cynicism; it’s how the human body reacts under an onslaught of trauma and a constant hammering of defeatism from every outlet that traded actually “informing” people to propagandizing and fueling learned helplessness. Matt Zimmer recently brought up Mister Rogers and his advice in an era of rampant doomerism-peddling from the news: “Look to the helpers.”

 

The people of Minnesota helping one another and defending one another from a modernized KKK dressed like shock troops that coldly killed two American citizens that the state later slandered as domestic terrorism. The people of Los Angeles, in my state of California, driving back National Guard shock troops and exposing the lie about state-sanctioned terrorism masquerading as “federal enforcement”. The spiritual leaders who refuse to give themselves over to Jesus-hating, red-cap-wearing cultists with crosses and Trump Bibles thirsting for a “Christian nation” when my Sunday School teacher preached that “God’s Kingdom is not of this Earth.” And even myself – after all, my life mission is mainly built on service. The service I provide for our disabled community weekly, Monday to Friday. The service that has know netted me two promotions – one in 2023, the other in March 2025. The same service and training that aided me with helping up my epileptic former coworker at my old grocery job who suddenly fell to the ground while other customers just walked on by.

 

“Look to the helpers.”

 

And along with this self-reflection, I looked at a birthday card that my younger brother got me for last year’s Halloween. It was a simple card with some pop-out smiling sushi roll characters, saying “Let the good times roll.” But inside is where the real message was:

“Keep moving forward and building for the future! …. Happy Birthday!”

Those are the marching orders I just gave myself today. And completing this UnComix One-Shot was a big part of cheering me up. So, to Matt Zimmer, I’ll say once more: Gilda and Meek and the Un-Iverse is a comic series so unlike any that I’ve ever read. Thank you.

 

Gonna get some rest for now before I journey back to chill with The Piranha again, so until then, peace and love to you all!

Nana

--“Jason Deroga”

Comments

[matt_zimmer]

Sweet review!

Notes:

Chirp is Narf-Narf's best friend. He knows he's a sociopath. It doesn't bother him. If the Narrator is saying he didn't know he's wrong. The Narrator is often wrong about stuff like that.

It's Anderson, not Robinson. Although frankly, Robinson would probably be a better last name for Meek and Bernadette. I'm happy with most of the names of my characters but the Andersons are Andersons simply because I couldn't think of something better that also fit. Robinson would have worked.

The Learned Republican is basically a smart Republican. He knows his shit. But like all Republicans with a speck of decency, nobody listens to him. That's the joke.

Fun Fact: Bernadette Anderson is also a Republican. It makes her upcoming fued with Vic Puff especially ironic for that reason.

Glad you're noticing the pacing in the Howler stories. Pacing means everything to me and once you get to a certain point The Un-Iverse stops feelings like a comic book, and more like a TV show. Candice keeps calling issues "episodes" because the pacing is cinematic, which is not true for most other comic books at all.

[jasonderoga86]

Thanks for those extra notes, they're always helpful.

And I agree; Candice is absolutely right. Most other comic books don't have the pacing of a cinematic experience, especially now that "the industry" is clearly dying a slow, miserable death. Marvel and DC remain the "Big Two", but solely for licensing and merch; I don't know a single person who openly goes to their local comic book shop to buy the latest issue of Avengers (insert name of maxiseries here) or Justice League (see "Avengers" plus the obligatory overhyped "This is it! The Ultimate Battle for Reality Begins!" tagline). They're overpriced as hell, and the stakes are a joke due to the predictable Cosmic Reset Device or Omnipotent Retcon Rebel tropes. Yet somehow fresh, unorthodox comics remain standing the shadows of the Big Two because "the industry" values dollars instead of readers; the long overdue bankruptcy of Diamond Comics Distributors, which maintained a near unbreachable monopoly on the distribution and direct market, at the start of January in 2025 was inevitable, and for the first time Marvel and DC didn't have a distribution platform that provided what Diamond did.

Honestly, I shed no tears over Diamond folding or "the industry" collapsing under its own hubris; Beloved Nickelodeon Studios/Boom! Studios comic book artist Ian McGinty's death in June of 2023, the "ComicsBrokeMe" movement that followed -- which I like to describe as "the Black Lives Matter Movement of Comics" -- and the simultaneous WGA/SAG-AFTRA strike against Hollywood together reveal an inconvenient truth for moguls in the entertainment industry: the dirty little secret of talent exploitation and corporate malpractice was doomed to be exposed. It was the most insidious type of capitalism, and the fact that U.S. Copyright Law doesn't support unionization for all of the people seduced by the promises of recognition and fortune is really the final nail in the coffin.

I don't regret my brief ride with Alterna Comics spotlighting Lil' Hero Artists -- it was a great experience and gave me a deeper look into how a small press publisher operates. But the truth is, both LHA and Sneakers' U-Force would not have gotten as far they have if I were banking my sole source of income on them. Jess just announced that she's going through a lot of changes -- family, job, and funeral plans for her late father -- as well as wanting to return to some old art hobbies unrelated to Promised Memories for a change. She also emphasized her need to keep creating more traditional art in this era of encroaching AI proliferation. I responded by telling her that she and she alone decides where to take Promised Memories and commended her commitment to pursuing traditional art. And I also shared with her something my collaborator Nick Vollmer once told me; that any work of art is an expression of the soul of the artist, and pouring that soul into the work brings fulfillment and a sense of calm. Therefore, if an artist creates something for any reason other than fulfillment, then the art loses some of that soul. Getting published by a "reputable" publisher by today's standards is the equivalent of having one's soul sucked out of their body, and signing themselves into bondage while their work is literally the publisher's cash cow.

I didn't mean to write an essay, it's just that Candice decidedly spells out not only the reason why "the industry" is basically dead, but the refusal of the industry's remaining gatekeepers to offer anything other than cash cow franchises. Money doesn't buy happiness, especially in a crooked industry like the comics business. "Indies" are officially where it's at, and the creativity in this realm is something to behold. Gilda and Meek is very much a cinematic experience to me as well -- how else can I explain today, when I was glued to the screen for nearly three hours just because the experience was so unique?

...and this isn't the first time I got "hooked" on your stories. In fact, EVERY time has felt that way. Both you and Candice know wassup. 😉